| Sandman neglected me again... |
[Jul. 20th, 2004|04:56 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  melancholy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | R.E.M. | ] |
So, we're gonna update in here cuz matt wont be able to read this. I cant sleep. I've been so stressed lately. And i just cant talk to anyone about all of this. I should, but i just cant. I tried gettin away for awhile since i kno i wont be able to for awhile prolly. That just seemed to cause more problems. But, thats not the main thing that has me upset. Matt, the marine ive been dating, is home on leave for a month. He goes back July 28th to his base. Then he leaves for Iraq. And hes a regular solider, which means hes going to be in the middle of the fighting. Thats 8 days from today. He'll be there for 7 months to a year. It just sucks. I'm gonna be so worried about him. I've been spending as much time with him that i can. Of course, hes been goin to pittsburgh alot to see family. And he leaves tomorrow again for a few days. I hate this stupid war and stupid bush. Grr. Ok enough venting on that.
THeres other things going on. I just dont really want to share them on here. I kno that i have plenty of people i can go to with things. It's just hard to explain everything. Theres just too much going on. Too many things happening to people that are close to me. I just dunno what to do. Theres nothing i CAN do really. And i kno worrying or stressing doesnt help. I know all these things, yet i cant help it. I dunno, i have to figure something out or my stomachs going to hate me.
But now im off to read or sumthin till i can pass out...
-heath |
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| WoO! |
[Jun. 23rd, 2004|11:21 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  bouncy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | grateful dead | ] |
Hey hey kids! Yea, havnt posted for awhile. Things went crazy, and my stomach was bein a bitch. But....im back! Krissy got my navel pierced for me on my bday! WoO! Then, that friday was a party at Mikey;s and then on saturday my chambersburg hippies had a lil get together for me. So my bday weekend was great. Amy got her nipple pierced! Crazy! James said he'll pay for me to get my tongue pierced. I'm excited about that. Hopefully I can get that done soon.
The jamband showcase is cancelled. :( Dammit! The fairgrounds backed outta the agreement. Damn bastards! And they cant find another place under such short notice. Soooo....John's got another festival for us to go to. So that should be cool. I have a ton of stuff i have to get together for the festivals.
I met another great gay boy! Mikey;s new man Chris. He rocks. Gonna go chill over there in a couple days. Yay! New cute gay boy. Now just gotta find a nice straight one that doesnt make me go nuts! lol Oh well...im gonna go now, im gonna watch a movie or sumthin.... Talk to u kids later....
-heath |
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| quizzes! |
[Jan. 24th, 2004|04:33 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  high | ] |
 You Are a Switch!Top. Bottom. Giver. Taker. You can't make up your mind. And truth is, why should you? Kink is wildest when you can switch roles. You're ability to get off in all sorts of ways makes you a versitile lover. You can get along with a sub or dom(me) - but another switch is what really blow your mind Are You Dominant or Submissive?More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva
 Your Bedroom Personality Is Seductive!You leave a lasting impression on each partner.What this means:In each relationship, you take the role of the seducer or seductress. You set the scene, light the candles, and make sure a good time is had. You are a true master when it comes to foreplay and sex. What your lovers love about you:You are more than a good lover - you are an expert teacher. You show your lovers what it means to bathe in sensuality. Turning them into seductive types once your relationship is over. What your lovers can't stand about you:You take the act of seduction seriously... So seriously that quick sex is pretty much out of the quesiton. As well as, no frills comfort sex. What's *Your* Bedroom Personality?More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva |
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| shocker! |
[Jan. 17th, 2004|11:16 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  sleepy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Biggie | ] |
 You are Marijuana!Laid back, dreamy, and maybe a little stinky from skipping a shower. You rather hang out on the couch watching That 70s Show than go clubbing. All you need is a big joint, TV, and some Twinkies covered in chocolate syrup! What Drug Are You?More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva
 You Are Retro Sexy!You have a classic sex appeal that passes the test of time. You're feminine, subtle with your seductions, and perfectly tuned into men. A woman with your attention to detail is rare find and a true prize. You're an incredible catch for any guy, especially rich older ones. What Kind of Sexy Are *You*?More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 29th, 2003|02:12 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | drained | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Jon Mayer | ] |
Well...finally sumthin good happened. I just talked to suzy and im goin over to the apartment to chill with her tonight. Cant wait. I;ve missed my suzy! Hopefully everyone over there will help my mood.
I've had alot on my mind lately. And then yesterday shit happened and just brought more stuff for me to have on my mind. I'm sick of it. I just want things to be simple and to be happy. Apparently thats too much to ask for. I dont really want to be around anyone right now. I just want to be alone. Some people i kno are attempting to hook me up. I dont even want a guy around right now. Im sick of bein screwed over. And im sick of gettin hurt. I dont want to be touched i dont want to be looked at. Today i almost told some guy off for checkin me out. And yesterday my mom tried to hug me and i just didnt want to be touched. I dont kno what is wrong with me. Just way too much bullshit on my mind. And im sick of meaning nothing. And feeling like im worthless. I hate that feeling.
I'm dreading going to work tonight. I have too much on my mind and all im gonna do is think about it. And right now i just want to cry. So im gonna go and try and calm down before work...
-heath |
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| too much thought for one mind |
[Dec. 17th, 2003|08:57 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  cynical | ] |
Hrrmm. Well. I HATE having feelings. Its rather a pain in the ass at times. Ok so the one guy im kinda seeing, dave, is a nice guy. Yet, rather shallow and egotistical. And for SOME fukkered up reason any time im with him im sittin there thinkin about MIKE. WHY?! i dont kno! I try not to think about mike, but it happens. And i dont understand it. Or, sometimes i think about mario or think about what im plannin for the week. lol Ok, the dave guys ego is just HUGE. And he constantly seems to try and get me to inflate it for him. So, the way i am, i do the opposite. lol And he also spends more time on his hair than i do, and cares more about his than i do mine. That makes me worry.
I think i might do sumthin with mike this week...havnt decided yet. He asked, but i dunno. We'll see. Anyone out there kno a NICE single straight guy, lemme kno... lol
Other news...I was at the garage all day today. My car shakes, and theyre fixin it. I gotta take it back again in the morning cuz they arent done. But its cool...the mechanic that works on my car is mad cute. lol Ok im off i have to do laundry and work on classwork. ill talk to ya kids later...
<3-heath |
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| new addition and confuckling subject |
[Dec. 3rd, 2003|03:32 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  weird | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | The Joker- Steve Miller Band | ] |
Well...i updated my main blog thinger. So if u wanna kno all thats goin on check that out. But since im bored i figured that id update this one too. I got a new kitten! Hes sooooo cute. Im gonna take a pic after i get home from work tonight and if you wanna see just ask. I think im gonna name him Gerry, im not sure tho...cant decide. If u have any ideas lemme kno!
And since Mike doesnt kno about this journal ill write about him in here. lol Hmm..he seems to care about me more than i thought he did. Its just kinda...weird. Like, he pissed me off and hurt me. But then i think about waht all he told me and i can see he wouldnt have reacted the way he did if he didnt care. So i dunno. Im just gonna be VERY careful and see what happens. Like he told me today hes definetly still interested in me, which was the EXACT opposite that i thought he was gonna say. I dunno its confuckling. ill just be VERY cautious and see what happens. What really surprised me was he said he was still interested. Didnt expect that. I expected him to say no. I dunno...we'll see. But now im off to get ready for work and all that fun stuff...ill talk to ya kids later...
<3-heath |
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| WoO! |
[Nov. 25th, 2003|10:38 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | high | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | #7 on whitestripes album | ] |
Hey kids. As you can tell by my mood, im high. :D WoO! I just got a FAT 8th off of my buddy josh. Ah i love him. He rocks. Ive barely chilled with him, but he like hooked me UP. Like im serious. AND hes mad cute. I used to be kinda interested in him but didnt kno how to ask him to chill. And ive just talked to him whenever i go into the getty for a few min. And today i was like, we need to chill. And hes like ive got off tomorrow. And im like cool. So im supposed to meet him after my class tomorrow to chill. Cant wait. If he would be interested in me. That would just plain rock. Hes hott, and chill, and is like my type. AND a pothead. Its great. lol Now only if itd go past friends... Just have to see.
Well since i odnt have an attention span at the moment...im gonna go...ill talk to u kids later...ive got munchies to attend to, and have to change the tv...
<3 -heath |
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| why?? |
[Nov. 15th, 2003|01:47 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | depressed | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | "Stairway to Heaven"- Dolly Parton | ] |
Grr xanga is STILL down. So im gonna write in here. How the hell does something that happens over a year ago STILL effect your life in some of the worst ways possible?? It fukkin pisses me off and depresses me at the same time. I just dont kno whether i want to freak out and go violent or if i want to curl up in a ball and cry myself to sleep. It just sucks. I fukkin hate it. It was ONE day...and it has fukked my life up more than i ever thought it could.
Right now im killing time before my brother gets home so i can talk to him before i freak out. I think ill take a bubble bath and read or sumthin. I dunno. I just kno im kinda messed up right now. And i gotta work all weekened and i have class in the morning. I dont think im goin to class in the morning tho. I feel like hell right now and i kno ill be bad in the morning too.
And everyone is havin isssues with the ken situation. Its over stupid bullshit. And i hate it. I love mikey and i love the boys and i hate seein em fight like this. It hurts and upsets me. I miss when we all got along and chilled and were happy and shit. And now its all messed up and i cant stand it. I just wish i could fix it. I dunno...
Alright since all i did was bitch in this entry stitch and i are gonna go to bed. He's the only man i can trust....hes cute and cuddly and BLUE! ;) My kinda man. Alright but seriously now im gonna go take a bath and illt alk to u kids later..
-heath |
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| never know.... |
[Nov. 14th, 2003|04:17 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  restless | ] |
Well...since xanga wont let me update my site, might as well do a quick entry here.... I've gotta go to work at 5 tonight...and i REALLY dont wanna go. I would like to just stay home in my bed and watch a movie or sumthin. I dunno...
Well last night i went and chilled with Mike. It was fun. We went to his place for a lil, then to his friends place and we stayed there for the night. I think ive watched more than enough anime for awhile...lol Thats basically all we did was smoke and watch anime. Haha i played halo. Never played it before and damn do i ever suck! lol
Blah all i wanna do is stay home and lay in my bed, but noooo my sisters commin home tonight and i gotta work. Ive been thinkin too much today. And most of it isnt that great. I told my brother about the one big thing in my past. Yea this is gonna be vague if u dont kno me, but i dont feel like explainin it. Oh well i just got a call so i gotta get goin...
-heath |
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| boredom strikes! |
[Nov. 12th, 2003|04:45 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | bored | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | whatever is music in this movie "Final" or sumthin like that | ] |
You're like a Unicorn!
?? Which Mythical Creature Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla
You're goin' down! FOR DOING DRUGS!
Please rate if you liked!
groups.msn.com/punkassbitchmutherfckers
visit here if you're a punkassbitchmutherfcker for
funny crap!
What Would You Go to Jail For? (Many outcomes)
brought to you by Quizilla
"It's Tricky" (by Run DMC)
It's Tricky to rock a rhyme to rock a rhyme that's
right on time
It's Tricky...it's Tricky (Tricky) Tricky (Tricky)
It's Tricky to rock a rhyme to rock a rhyme that's
right on time
It's Tricky...Tr tr tr tricky (Tricky)
Trrrrrrrrrrricky
Which 80's Song Fits You?
brought to you by Quizilla |
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| blah |
[Nov. 11th, 2003|04:16 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | tired | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | If it makes you happy- Sheryl Crow | ] |
hey hey..figured id put a REAL entry in here. lol I just got back from physics. I like physics a helluva lot more than bio. My bio teacher sucks. Ah well. Unfortunately, i have to go to work in about 30 minutes. This weekend wasnt bad...well sunday and monday. Sunday night krissy and i went over to jeannies to chill with her and nate for awhile. The bear is now back at the apartment. WoO! I LOVE that thing. lol
Monday Amy and i went to chill at Kimmah's and then i planned on goin home, but krissy called and wanted me to go visit derek with her. That was cool. He's a good guy...and theyre cute together. ;) Haha when we got to his house....we stood outside his window, and i threw a quater at the window and scared the shit outta him. lol it was HILARIOUS. Shouldve seen him jump. Haha. BUt yea, it was cool.
I dunno whats up with Mario...damn men! I'm tellin ya what. So, Mike's been askin me out to do shit with him, and ive kept puttin him off or ive actually been busy when he wanted to. So, im goin to go see him thrusday. I guess im meetin him in york and then we're goin to maryland. I might just end up stayin the night, depends on if im havin fun. Which i will, hes a cool guy. Ha, you should see his white boy ghetto dance...lol its funny. He was givin me greif cuz we were tryin to figure out what we were gonna do, and hes like if you wouldnt be underage we could go to the bar. I was like, my bad i was born late. lol Oh well. So it should be fun.
AH yeah, durin the day on thursday ive got a doctors appt down in baltimore, so i guess ill be goin to maryland TWICE in one day. lol Damn car trips. Oh well. But yea i need to get him to switch my meds or sumthin. This no concentration thing is drivin me NUTS. Damn meds. I hate them. But, i dont take them and im worse, so its kinda lose either way. Ah well i have the appt thrusday so we'll see how it goes.
Well kids im off to work, so ill talk to ya later!
-heath |
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| lmao |
[Nov. 5th, 2003|05:13 pm] |
lmao this is from krissy's site and i thought my answers were funny....
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| pssh |
[Nov. 5th, 2003|01:00 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  frustrated | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Perfect- Simple Plan | ] |
yea i took this quiz awhile ago and got the same results....if im so perfect why am always screwed over or alone?? hmm?? answer me that one!
-Perfect- You're the perfect girlfriend. Which
means you're rare or that you cheated :P You're
the kind of chick that can hang out with your
boyfriend's friends and be silly. You don't
care about presents or about going to fancy
placed. Hell, just hang out. You're just happy
being around your boyfriend.
What Kind of Girlfriend Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla |
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| quizzes |
[Nov. 5th, 2003|12:45 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  lazy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Milkshake | ] |
Hey hey...if u wanna kno whats goin on with me, check out my xanga...but heres some quizzes i took ;)
You are Form 1, Goddess: The Creator.
"And The Goddess planted the acorn of life.
She cried a single tear and shed a single drop
of blood upon the earth where she buried it.
From her blood and tear, the acorn grew into
the world."
Some examples of the Goddess Form are Gaia (Greek),
Jehova (Christian), and Brahma (Indian).
The Goddess is associated with the concept of
creation, the number 1, and the element of
earth.
Her sign is the dawn sun.
As a member of Form 1, you are a charismatic
individual and people are drawn to you.
Although sometimes you may seem emotionally
distant, you are deeply in tune with other
people's feelings and have tremendous empathy.
Sometimes you have a tendency to neglect your
own self. Goddesses are the best friends to
have because they're always willing to help.
Which Mythological Form Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla
Tomboy
What's your sexual appeal?
brought to you by Quizilla |
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| hey hey |
[Oct. 24th, 2003|12:53 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | blah | ] |
Heya....i figure ill put a stupid lil entry in here real quick before i run off to class. SInce krissy rocks and made this for me...even tho ill normally only post in xanga. so oh well! yea im a lil high right now and must go to class so ill talk to ya kids later and make a better entry...this is basically just so that i can see what my page looks like so i can change it lol.
<3 -heath |
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